In the fall of 2020 as the pandemic raged, a friend of mine asked me to edit a fundraising letter for a non-profit. Bored and a little restless, I jumped at the chance to write something a little different.
It took me less than hour to complete. It was so satisfying to finish it. When I sent it to my friend, she said she teared up reading it.
Interesting, I thought. I felt like I'd found some forgotten skills. It reminded me of the thrill I got whenever I wrote fiction. That thrill of connecting people with an emotional story was still there.
Shortly after that newsletter experience, I listened to a song by the Korean group BTS and my world came to bit of a stop.
The song was called First Love and it's by member SUGA off their WINGS album. The song is a conversation between SUGA and his first love - the piano. For anyone who has a creative passion it will resonate. He talks about walking away from music several times in his life and each time it pulling him back. He eventually realized music was there through everything.
Even when I pushed you away
Even when I resented meeting you
You were firmly by my side
You didn't have to say anything
So don't ever let go of my hand
I won't let you go ever again either
My birth and the end of my life
You will be there to watch over it all
I thought, that's what my writing has been for me. Growing up I spent weekends filling notebooks upon notebooks with fanciful characters and stories. To this day I can't leave on a road trip or vacation without a notebook and pen. We've even had to stop at a store on our way somewhere because I've forgotten to pack one. For reasons that could fill endless therapy sessions, I didn't pursue it in post-secondary.
For almost 20 years I've written freelance articles or worked full-time for various media organizations, only writing non-fiction. Getting paid as a word monkey is deeply satisfying, don't get me wrong. I love writing and editing -- whether it's ad copy or social amping or stories about a local business or program.
But writing a story? A fictional story with fictional characters and a plot? I left that behind in childhood, I thought. I had attempted to write fiction before and failed miserably. Why would I try again?
Something in me snapped as I sat there crying listening to someone rap about returning to their first creative passion.
I opened up a word document and started typing. I made a commitment that I would write every day. In fact, I promised myself I would write a thousand words every day until I either hated it or learned how to do it.
The first month everything I wrote was crap. Sometimes I didn't know what to write so I would play around with poetry. And believe me, I am not a poet.
After a while, there were snatches of dialogue that made me smile, or a description of a mood that tickled me. Nothing felt cohesive. I kept at it, though. Then I hit upon an idea that was fun to write. I kept writing it and tweaking it.
I must admit, that original story got shelved in the summer. I didn't have the skill (at the time) to fix a timeline issue. Don't worry, I'm going back to it. However, to keep myself writing, I decided to work on the backstory of some of the characters. I kept writing a thousand words a day. Sometimes I struggled to hit five hundred, other days especially on weekends I'd hit six or seven thousand. I quickly realized the backstory was just as interesting on its own.
A few months later I finished it. A complete story. With a beginning, a middle, and an end. It's a big deal for the girl who never finishes any of her projects to finish a 75,000-word novel.
While it's just a first draft, I've been so excited I have to restrain myself from stopping strangers on the street to tell them I'm done.
And I know so much of it will probably change during revisions and editing, but for the first time, I'm going to reveal the title and a two-sentence description:
A Fondness for the Reckless: a Ten Past Midnight Story.
Founded by best friends Jaxson and Indie, Canadian pop sensations Ten Past Midnight arrive to their first major television interview without Indie. Will the band survive when they learn he's at the airport on his way to sign without another label?
I guess, step one is done. What's next?
First, I will let my story rest for a month or more. Which, by the way, is absolute hell. As I write this, I'm five days in and I've written two blog posts, a Christmas letter, and a thousand words on my memoir. (A thousand words a day, remember!)
[UPDATE: Two weeks later and I'm up to about five thousand on the memoir.]
After the break, I will hopefully have fresh eyes to take a look at my novel and start editing and revising. In May and June (COVID willing), I hope to be in Toronto doing more research for it. You'll hear more about that process over the next several months as I get ready for our trip and get my novel ready for publishing. Whether it's worthy of being published or how that will be done has yet to be determined.
Because, in case anyone is wondering, I basically have no idea what I'm doing.
Comments